If you ask The Real Housewives of New York CityBershan Shaw’s new “friend” on her behavior so far on the show will tell you that she just lives up to the show’s name. Well, at least one word in that name: Real.
“I’m real,” the multiprenor (as she calls herself) tells ET through a video chat, just days after the most explosive episode of season 13 to date, that explosion is due in large part to Bershan. The RHONY rookie found himself at odds with nearly the entire cast after proclaiming that his new friends were “boring grandmothers” at a dinner party during a girls’ trip to Salem, Massachusetts. Bershan really took an interest in longtime star Sonja Morgan, whom he repeatedly called “clown” and, later, “ho.”
“When I say something, it is not meant to be negative,” explains Bershan. “I mean, that was really a bit left, but it’s meant to be who I am. And I think, love me or hate me, I’m going to be as real as they come.”
Since this trip was the first time most women had spent a significant amount of time with Bershan, they did not seem to understand that concept. Therefore, the night is gone.
“You realize that, uh-oh, it’s not your friends that you’re used to saying this to, so they take it personally,” admits Bershan. “They look like, ‘Grandma ?! Have you lost your mind?’ And I say this all the time. You know what? I guess Bershan had to learn. Okay, these aren’t people you’ve known for 20 or 15 years. Get to know them. And I guess I learned that I had to get to know them first, right? ? “
“When you meet someone, you have to walk slowly,” he adds. “I was not slow to walk.”
Bershan was a fan of RHONY before joining the cast, leading some viewers to think that his nickname, if it can be called that, was born out of preconceived notions of who these women are or how he expected them to act. The motivational speaker says that’s not the case at all.
“It wasn’t like I was trying to read the chart and let them have it,” he says, revealing that if he judged women based on his fans’ perception, he would have called them something other than “grandmothers.” . “
“I walked in thinking women were BITCHES, I really did,” confesses Bershan. “But actually, they aren’t. I really thought I was like, ‘Okay, I’m going to hang out with a bunch of women who are just bad girls. And I don’t feel like it.’ But they’re not really bad girls. They really are great. Women, they all have a different story, they all have a different background and we are all different. That’s what I love. We are all different. “
Bershan says that prodding women was simply his way of trying to get to know them. Unfortunately, it backfired a bit, especially with Sonja, who in turn called Bershan a “wet blanket.”
“I love Sonja to death,” says Bershan. “It’s beautiful. It’s fun. You don’t need the drinks. You’re fun, inspiring, entertaining, without it. And that’s what I was trying to get at. So maybe it was too much in your face, but yeah. … No you need the big red shoes, because you’re amazing anyway. “
Alcohol definitely played a role in the Bershan-Sonja dynamic, as the more wine flowed, the worse communication between the pair became. Things seem to take a sharp turn in this week’s episode, with a “physical altercation” (Leah McSweeney’s words) ending with Sonja slamming through the glass plate covering a fire extinguisher.
“Oh yeah. Wow,” Bershan says when the moment is mentioned. “I mean, I think we drank too much, right? And drinking causes some SHIT. Let’s be clear. But I mean come on, Sonja and I, we’re not going to get physical. That’s not even in my nature. in its nature. Let’s be clear. “
“But it escalated,” he continues. “It intensified and it intensified and it intensified … I think it went too far.”
In a preview for this week’s episode, Luann de Lesseps essentially tells Ramona Singer, who introduced Bershan to the group, to give the life coach an ultimatum: either “fix it” or Bershan is out of the group.
“Look, no one pushes the baby into the corner,” Bershan jokes. “But I realized I went too far, right? I went too far. Even as a coach, I went too far. You know what I mean? Facing motivation, I push buttons. This is what I do, and this is how I get results. But it wasn’t like I was training, because I was in the moment being real, but it’s just my nature anyway. With friends, with my dad… So I apologize, because you know what? I went too far. “
“I could have stopped too,” says Bershan. “You make mistakes, you fail, you do something wrong. What do you do? You apologize. I am human, you guys. I am not Mother Teresa.”
Before things escalated to the point of piercing glass, the women tried to get Bershan to retreat. Luann, Leah, and Eboni K. Williams spoke with the podcast host about the evening and wondered if Ramona had cheated on Bershan in any way. The trio pointed to the comments Bershan made about Leah, which appeared to be Ramona’s regurgitated thoughts. But Bershan says Ramona I did not do it cheat on her, at least not that way.
“She said it was going to be a lot of fun, she said we were going to show up,” notes Bershan. “I was like, ‘I want to have kiki, have fun, drink, loud, crazy.’ So I thought it was like that, and then I felt like we were sitting at the table watching each other.”
Bershan promises that things will take a pick-up for the group starting with this week’s episode, and asks viewers to give the cast a bit of grace. They filmed season 13 in the midst of the coronavirus pandemic, something she says fans don’t seem to be taking into account when criticizing the latest episodes.
“Girls are good,” says Bershan. “I think you guys are a bit harsh on them. I mean, it was COVID. It was COVID. It was COVID. New York was closed. … You guys are killing us before you see it all. I mean, look, Episode 10 is going to be in. Well, 11, 12, 13, 14. Wait. It’s good. It’s a good thing. I mean, I remember filming it. I had the best time of my life with women, so I think it’s going to get better every time more, and you don’t want it all up front. Wait. “
Bershan says RHONY fans should expect “a lot of fun, a lot of kiki’ing, a lot of girl talk” in the second half of season 13. “I mean, look, I think Ramona, her boldness, Sonja, her crazy, Leah, her center, Eboni is Eboni. She’s going to talk about what she’s talking about, “she offers, adding to the already interesting dynamic between her and Eboni, who is also black and also new to the franchise this season. The pair didn’t exactly click right away.
“Sorry, two black women come on the show and we have to be the same. Do we have to think the same? Do we have to dress the same? I mean, gosh. Can’t we have differences of opinion?” Bershan asks. “Two white women could come in and they are different … So we are just different. There is no shadow for Eboni.”
Bershan says Eboni best summed up their differences, calling Bershan “open arms” and herself “very reserved.”
“I don’t think it was negative or positive, we are just different approaches,” says Bershan. Some viewers (and, well, the wives themselves) have complained that Eboni “preaches” to women on racial issues. Eboni has defended her on-screen discussions as authentic about who she is and what she cares about, even if the Ramonas of the world don’t want to talk about race, politics, and the Venn diagram in between.
“I love his approach,” admits Bershan. “What she’s saying needs to be told. It’s how you tell people, right? I learned these tools as a coach. Everyone doesn’t accept things in the same way. Not everyone hears things. in the same way, so you have to go to people and approach people in a different way. That’s right. There is no shadow for her. There is nothing wrong with it. I am loud. I am funny. This is how I do it. I am dancing on the tables. This is how I live my life. This is Bershan, really. Eboni is a lawyer. She is a journalist. That is a different personality than me, you know what I mean? So why do we have to be Like, ‘Oh, you have …’ No. We just have differences of opinion and we have obstacles along the way.
The future of this group of friends seems to be a bit up in the air, if the tabloid headlines are to be believed. Report after report claims there will be a major shakeup ahead of season 14, with the recording of the season 13 reunion supposedly delayed. Bershan says that “hopefully” will be present at the recording, but does not know yet. He also does not know if he will return for another season, but apparently he would not turn down the opportunity. Or, better yet, the ability to hold an apple.
“Never say never,” he says. “I love girls. I love shooting with them. I love that Bravo and Andy [Cohen] bought in diversity. Congratulations to them, because it was necessary. It is New York City. But I have a lot. I have a book to come out, I have an application to come out, I have a line of t-shirts. I mean, I’m doing a lot. I have an interior design business. “
In addition to all her work commitments, Bershan also seems to have a lot of personal history to share, should she return for season 14. She blurted out the most recent episode in which she was involved in “a lot of lawsuits”, in at least one involving her desire to have a child from the embryos she froze with her now ex-husband.
“Some crazy things happened to me,” he admits. “And with the lawsuits, I definitely want to have a baby. I want to make a surrogate. I’m looking into that right now. And so, I had some lawsuits for embryos that, fingers crossed, if I don’t get them, then it’s the surrogate route, and I’m on the way to surrogacy. But I’m fighting for them. I’m a fighter and I’m not giving up. So that’s Bershan’s journey. “
That is also the spirit behind your new experience with the app. Bershan’s new platform, URAWARRIOR (pronounced “You are a warrior”) is their way of giving back. It is a digital counseling service that it hopes will improve “mental health,” connecting users with experts, therapists, and survivors of difficult life events to show people that “you are not alone” when you feel there is no power outside. end of any tunnel you find. yourself. As a two-time cancer survivor, it’s a need that Bershan knows all too well.
“I live my best life to the fullest, baby, knowing that I am who I am, Bershan Shaw,” he says.